


Attract and then aggravate

by canadino



Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, you wanna kiss me so bad it makes you look stupid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:13:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27023317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/canadino/pseuds/canadino
Summary: Forbidding yourself something only makes you think about and want it more.
Relationships: Hyoudou Kumon/Settsu Banri
Comments: 10
Kudos: 51





	Attract and then aggravate

Banri won’t lie - he thinks negging Juza is extremely hilarious. He admits it is a little twisted, messing with someone for the fun of it. It’s like putting something in the path of an ant, watching it change course to avoid it, putting another thing in its path, and again and again, laughing while it runs around and around in circles. Juza has changed since high school though. Before, he would pour oil onto the match Banri would light, but nowadays he’s able to turn away and deflect or light a larger match to swallow the fuel Banri sets down. Certainly, since joining the Company, Banri’s also found other things to occupy himself besides harassing Juza, but calling a truce would be lame. Banri doesn’t think he’s quite at the point where he’s mature enough to move onto a respectful friendship with Juza; it’s one of the things that feels steady, while adulthood begins to sniff at the door. He thinks Juza kind of understands that. 

It has to be karma, though, that he gains his own horsefly, buzzing around him when he’s trying to mind his own business in his own pasture. “Hehe, looks like you’re finally learning from my brother. But I’ll have you know that my brother practices way more than you do. He takes his script into the bathroom and he runs lines when he’s cutting vegetables for mom at home. That’s exactly why he’s better than you.” Kumon is puffing his chest out. He had come into the practice room to look for his jacket, which he had left on the back of one of the chairs, and had taken the opportunity to nag Banri, who had been there thinking about blocking for their next play. Banri, unlike Juza, is leader of Autumn Troupe, so he has more than just the script to worry about. He wonders if Kumon knows that Tenma spends time outside of practice thinking about feedback and doesn’t come up with all of his instructions in the moment. 

In any case, Banri only needs a few hours with a script to have all his lines down, so all that detail about Juza’s memorization habits only proves he is still a mediocre actor. Going down that route would only dig himself deeper into the rabbithole that is Kumon’s passion for his older brother, though. Banri is not in the hobby of thinking about his rivals when they aren’t in front of him. “You’re so obsessed with me, it’s honestly sad,” Banri says, shaking his head in mock disappointment. Through his peripheral, he sees Kumon bristle. “I’m flattered that you’re thinking of me so much, but it’s just embarrassing for you at this point.”

“I am not!” Kumon quickly overheats in indignation. He bounces around, waving his hands. He had put his jacket back on the chair and would probably forget it again. “Ugh, gross! Thinking about you would give me brain cancer!” 

“Juza’s not even around to see you bravely defend his honor, so I have no choice but to think you just want to pick a fight with me because you love me so much,” Banri crows. Kumon shakes, a thousand rebuttals crowding in his mouth and coming out as sputtering. He storms up to Banri, who grins. “Aww, you want to kiss me so bad it’s so obvious.” 

Kumon’s face is bright pink. His mouth is shaping so many words, but what comes out is a loud, “Eww! I don’t want to kiss you! That’s so nasty! You’re my brother’s most hated person. I would never, ever, ever want that.” 

Banri cocks his head. This is so funny. “Oh? Didn’t you know? Sometimes, when someone wants to do something real bad, it makes them feel scared. They think it’s bad when they actually want to do it. Whenever Omi makes a fancy dessert, don’t you ever want to just push your hand in it because it looks way too perfect?”

Kumon definitely has felt that way, because his eyes darken and he falls silent for a split second before resuming his tirade. “I would never, never, never kiss you because you’re one-length, not because I’m scared. I’m not scared of you.” 

“Aww, you’re shaking. You’re so scared! You’re so scared of kissing me.” 

“I am not!” To prove it, Kumon grabs him to keep him still and kisses him on the mouth. It’s so not charming. Banri’s skilled, so he’s mentally prepared for this as a possibility; a perfect guy like him assesses the situation and responds accordingly. Though - he had only expected Kumon to give him a peck, the kind of kiss reserved for punishment games to show you aren’t a chicken by following through. Kumon keeps his mouth on Banri’s for way longer than anticipated. He keeps his mouth closed, but Banri feels him inhale through his nose before breaking away. “See! I’m not!” 

Banri can’t help but laugh. “You actually kissed me,” he says. Kumon is still gripping his shoulders tightly, frowning confusedly until his brain catches up with his body and his face turns bright red. 

“That’s--”

“So you did want to kiss me.” Now it’s Banri’s turn to grab Kumon. Not that he has to - Kumon’s in shock and hasn’t chosen either fight or flight yet. “Ahh, baby Hyodo, how hard was it to just admit that?”

“Noo,” Kumon warbles. He’s starting to thrash around, although he keeps staring at Banri’s mouth. “No, it was a joke! Are you so dumb you don’t get jokes?”

“Oh, was it?” It’s not like Banri wants to kiss Kumon. He’s never thought about it, the offshoot of Juza, who also gags when they accidentally reach for the soy sauce at the table at the same time (and Sakyo yells at them every time). But a perfect guy goes with the mood, and it’s hard to deny there’s some kind of mood happening. “If it was a joke, I didn’t get it because it was so not funny.” 

“It’s because you’re not funny,” Kumon says, and then somehow they’re kissing again, Kumon gripping his face so hard it kind of hurts. Kumon is noticeably shorter, so it feels like he’s hanging on. Banri holds him only to give him support so Kumon doesn’t rip his cheeks off. Of course, the feeling of Banri holding him only makes Kumon move around more. They topple over, Banri wincing at his back hitting the floor and Kumon putting all his weight onto his stomach when he falls forward. There’s no way he’s letting Kumon stay on top - he is just a twerp who does nothing but chirp around after his lame ass brother, after all - so Banri flips them over. He puts his own weight on to keep Kumon from wiggling, though Kumon stays still once they continue wrestling tongues after the readjustment. Banri’s balancing mainly on an elbow, so he moves his hand to a firmer surface than the air to get his bearings. This ends up being Kumon’s thigh, and Kumon lets out a loud groan into his mouth. 

“Hey man,” Banri says, and he’s a bit caught off-guard at how breathless his voice sounds. “Pornstar moaning is hot and all, but even that was a little loud.” That definitely breaks the immersion, and Kumon immediately throws him off. 

Banri feels his head cooling, a bit of guilt settling into his stomach, as Kumon scampers away and grabs his jacket, using it to cover his head. Kumon’s face is still fire red. “Please don’t tell my brother,” he begs. “Juza’ll disown me for sure.” 

“I would never tell Juza I macked on his baby brother.” That isn’t very soothing, because Kumon is still trembling with shame. “Look, that brocon isn’t going to disown you like that. Relax.” 

“Easy for you to say. It’s not like you’re the one with a brother who made out with your sworn enemy.” Kumon is so dramatic. “O-okay, so this never happened, okay?! Nothing happened! I came in here, grabbed my jacket, and left! That’s all. Obviously I’ll kill you if you tell anyone. Not that they’d believe you or anything.” 

“Yeah, yeah.” Kumon is still rooted in place, watching him warily. “If you don’t get out of here, there’s no promise I won’t attack you again.” It’s an empty threat, one that puts the onus on him, but it’s good enough to make Kumon sprint off, slamming the door behind him. How bothersome. Still, Banri think it’s a thrill he won’t knock. He is a bastard, after all. 

(Kumon meets his eyes at the dinner table and looks away a beat too late. Muku, unaware, begins talking about a new series he’s reading. It’s about a girl who falls for a bad boy and is trying to convince herself not to even though she’s so drawn to him. Kumon fumbles the curry ladle and splashes curry all over the table. Banri lets out a snort of laughter that feels uncannily out of place. Juza kicks him under the table for laughing at Kumon.)

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not going to say what I think about an apparently popular ship, but I'm sorry, this dynamic is way more interesting. As I stayed up way later than I should writing this, I couldn't help but wonder - was I the rat bastard and not Banri? 
> 
> A late night post so I don't get my ass beat. I tip my hat to this pairing for springing into my brain suddenly and prompting me to write this despite not actively shipping it.


End file.
